Yesterday was seven months since we were LID. We had a couple from church over for dinner who are interested in starting a home group. They were a nice couple. It's always interesting when you invite people over for dinner that you don't know at all. We turned out to have things in common, and E loved playing with their girls.
No new news really on the adoption front except that we hit the 7 month mark. Still waiting and doing ok with that right now. Bad news is that referrals came out last week, and the CCAA only referred 2 days worth of LIDs this month. Yep, you read that right. 2 days of LIDs this month. I do believe that is a new low record. At this rate, E might be in Kindergarten by the time L gets home. I think I can do Ok for another year and a half... (kinda my mental timeline... who knows if that's accurate?) but on the other hand, it's hard to believe that one year from now, a complete 4 season cycle from now, we'll still not know any thing more than we know now.
Luckily, Mom and Dad came up during the first week of April for her spring break, and E and I rode back down with them. Then we flew home this past Wednesday. So that has kept us busy, so it softened the blow about the 2 days worth of referrals done in an entire month. I think this "Let's sell and move to get more room" drive is partially related to keeping busy during the adoption wait. Moving, unpacking, especially as slow as I am with that, and decorating a new house will make the adoption wait go faster.
No news on the house front either. We lowered to 315, which has not created any new showings this week. Sigh. I'm doing better with it though right now. Kinda gone back into numb mode after the bank-foreclosure-dream-home sold. (Previous post). Another house that was on our radar also sold. It was a nice house, a little small, and farther out than we wanted to be. But still a nice house and new, and very affordable. A friend of our's sister bought it. So one reason I may be doing better is because there's not a house out there that we would be thrilled with right now. There is the house on the golf course (that makes it sound nice, doesn't it... "the house on the golf course".... it's not as nice as that sounds!! :) is a great house on the inside, but the water/septic situation is a little "iffy" and that's a big deal. That's really the only thing out there that would not be a major renovation project. I think Tuesday will mark the one year mark of our house being on the market. JH Realtor is out of town again with her family. She'll be going out of town again soon too. I just feel like we should be DOING something, but other than that frustration, doing much better. Still trying to trust that God is in control, and that pointing the finger at humans or human situations is not going to make our house sell. We all just do the best we can and make the best decisions we can, and trust God with the rest.
We just got back from S's 3 year old birthday party. E had fun, I think. He was kinda clingy at times during the party... Sometimes I worry he seems more that way than the other kids, (he definitely was the kid who was most like that today) although I know all kids go through that. It's hard as an adoptive parent because you don't want to make everything into an adoption related issue, when it's just normal kid stuff, but at the same time, you can't stick your head in the sand and pretend everything's fine when your baby needs help with an issue. I think that will be especially true with L since she will be older at adoption and in an institution before we get her. But I'm sensitive to that with E too. Sometimes he seems to show the sighs of anxious attachment. Clingy, he seems to be sucking his thumb more now than when he was younger, especially in social situations, his obsession with rubbing his dad's ears when we're out.... I know physical affection is important to him.... but is it weird he needs to do that when we're out and about, not just when we're cuddling while watching TV? I do think it's great he seems to need us and want us, but sometimes he just seems... a little anxious. But as I said earlier, I think all kids have that from time to time, and some kids' temperments seem to make them even more like that. But I just struggle with the whole "adoption is a loss, even infant adoptions, and kids are aware of that loss... resulting in issues with parental separation, etc etc..." to not wanting to make every quirk in his little personality as an (cue scary music.....)adoption issue! There are things I see though that he definitely manifests more than other 2.5 to 3 year olds that we know. I think J would tell me I'm being ridiculous and not to worry, he's just fine, but J also has done little to no reading on raising adopted kids either, not even the Bethany recommended books that are reasonably balanced. I just love my little E so much and want to help him. He seems VERY attached to us, and loves us so much, but I don't want that to impact his ability to go confidently into the rest of the world. If it is related to attachment and adoption, I want to help him process it, and not ignore an issue, if we can start working on it now.
Whew... didn't mean to go into all that.... just my ramblings this afternoon as E snoozes and J is at D's house working. Think I'll go take a nap now.
Night-night.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment